using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Randomize
