I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
