Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
