): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
