this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize