I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
