i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
