Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
