dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
