Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
