she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
