I'm passing your future prison.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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