How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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