every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
