with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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