we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
