my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize