here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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