My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I'm both gender and math confused
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
