guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
