tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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