You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize