"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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