what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
