i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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