My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
