Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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