Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
