I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize