i was born a porn star she said
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
