Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Randomize
