Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize