when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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