We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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