Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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