do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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