My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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