Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
accomplished twins. life is a go
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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