Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize