was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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