The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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