RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Randomize
