i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
