Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
