sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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