He is like the real live version of the state fair..
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
