yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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