I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
