I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Randomize
