I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
