very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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