Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
